Hello! My name is McKenna O’Meara and I am a Sophomore musical theatre major here at OCU.
When I saw that we had the opportunity to write a blog post for Healthy Relationships week, I knew I had to jump in and share one of the most important things I’ve learned about creating a healthy relationship - emotional intimacy. Something I have grown very familiar with in the past few months is the idea of emotional intimacy. As scary as that sounds, it’s a very normal, non-sexual, and important thing that everyone should have with their friends and partners. Emotional intimacy is “knowing that you have someone you can tell anything to, someone to go to with all your feelings, about anything and everything. You feel completely safe opening up to the other person, whether in the form of words, through an exchange of looks, or by just being together quietly in a state of connection.
Emotional intimacy is profoundly fulfilling, creating a sense of being seen for who you truly are. It can only exist when the other person seeks to know you, not judge you.” (Gibson). This idea is incredibly important for any relationship we choose to have in our lives. Finding emotional intimacy between partners and friends can create lasting, healthy, and long-term relationships. Although this seems like a no-brainer for people, it doesn’t always happen. A lack of emotional intimacy can sometimes be considered emotional abuse and is something to keep a lookout for. If you ever feel stressed or have doubts about a partner or friend, feel free to use this checklist. The more things that line up, the better the connection you two will have.
__ They respect your boundaries
__ They compromise
__ They are honest an
d open with their feelings
__ They apologize when they do wrong
__ They don’t ask for passwords to your phone or computer
__ They don’t make you feel guilty telling them no in any situation that makes you feel uncomfortable
__ They like to comfort you and be comforted
__ You feel understood around them and like you can be yourself
__ You feel safe around them always
It’s always good to have a lasting, good connection between you the people you love. Don’t be afraid to confront friends if you ever have an off feeling. If you have your doubts, know it’s better to be happy with someone who loves you for who you are, then to spend days stressed or feeling unsafe.
Enjoy Healthy Relationships Week everyone!
I got a lot of my information above from a book called “Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents” by Lindsay C. Gibson.